Its Sunday

Its Sunday, and I did not go to church this morning.  So often I work on Sunday, so when I am off I try to go.  But today I did not, no particular reason.  I am reading, praying, and listening to Christian/worship music.  Guess I am feeling a little blah and did not want to get ready and go.

I discovered something very interesting on the Gay Church site.  The church I was baptized in, a Baptist church in northern Virginia, is now American Baptist, and part of the Alliance of Baptists.  It is listed on Gay Church.com as an open and affirming church.  On the church webpage, they identify as welcoming, and affirming. Makes me wish I could attend there again. 

Its a gorgeous day so I'm going to get out in it some today.  Hope you have an awesome Sunday.  

Church Today

Once a month now, I am visiting a church of a different denomination.  Mostly I am looking for different Worship experiences, but also looking at the possibility of finding a denomination where it my sexuality and being a minister/chaplain would not be an issue.

Today, I visited an Episcopal church close to home.  This particular Parish has been on my list since it  is listed on the website www.gaychurch.org, as being an open and affirming congregation. Also, the Episcopal Church, ordains gay Priests, Deacons, and Bishops.  I enjoyed the service, it was very different from what I am used to.  I did not stay for the Eucharist, or Communion since I am not Episcopalian.  The Sermon was brief, (nothing wrong with that) and spoke to me in that the Rector talked about singing the song that is in your heart, and singing it loudly.  He made the point our individual song are the gifts, and talents we have within us.  Let them out of us and use them to the glory of God. I left after the offering was taken and they were singing the offering Hymn. 

I may visit here again sometime. Next month I am thinking of visiting a Disciples Church.

Tomorrow's Monday Medley will be the annual Halloween edition.   

Sin or...Something Else?

 

 SIN OR WHAT? The cartoon below was in the paper a few days ago, and I thought I would share it along with some thoughts.  I am always struck by how closed and judgmental some religious groups are. Notice I said religious, not just Christian.  It runs through all religions I think.  Whenever some disaster, disease,  or some other crisis befalls us, there is some person of faith who makes the statement, this happened because YOU did some bad thing.  Its  God's judgment and punishment for something.  Well I say NO. 

 

 God did not make the fire burn down your house, God did not give you cancer, or some other negative thing because you are a bad person, did something bad. I have come to understand, these things happen because we live in an imperfect world. They happen as part of life lived in what a Christian calls a fallen world. True there often is a cause and effect if a person smokes for 60 years it most likely will cause some kind of health issue, but God did not cause it.  60 years of smoking caused it.  You drive 90 miles an hour in a 55 zone you might get arrested.  Now I also believe in God's protection, often times I am protected even though I did something stupid.  god did not cause the storms, tornadoes and such to destroy property because people did bad things.  its a weather pattern.  This is not to say God might not use it to bring about something in one's life. The Biblical principle here runs through the entire Bible.  Something might be evil, or negative, but God brings something good out of it. Sure its hard, but there are many examples in Scripture of the hard things bringing something better about.  Jesus talked of the wine press, Peter talks of trials by fire, James even talks about facing trials with JOY! Knowing the result will be something good, better, and there is a reward.  In the old testament, we see it when Jeremiah, Nehemiah, and others experience trials and end up bringing something good about.  Hence the statement the world means it for evil, but God means it for good.

 

Another point,

Matthew 7:3-5

New International Version (NIV)

³ “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? ⁴ How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? ⁵ You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

 

 

I think these verses say it plainly, the people who like to point out with such judgment the sin of another, should pay more attention to their own problems and sin. Before they try to call attention to others troubles. 

 

To break it down farther:  When anti gay people start judging the gay community and spewing hateful venom, especially in the form of invoking god's judgment, beware!  Think of Matthew 7:3-5.

 

 

Finally, when someone says this happens because of God's judgment, think of the Peanuts cartoon  and smile! 

September Sweet September!

The calendar has rolled around to September again.  I love it!  It means autumn is near, I love autumn as much as spring.  The colors, the coolness in the air, Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas all around the corner. Oh and its my birthday month! Yep will be a year older blah! I'm going to think of it as being a fine wine, gets better with age!

Today, I missed going to church all together, I had planned on going, but was not sure where to go, then thought I would just go to my home church.  Then a friend contacted me last night and we made plans for this morning that precluded me going to church. Then this morning, those plans changed again, and I missed out all together.  On the other hand I relaxed, walked three miles and got laundry done. 

Church, I wish I could find a church I can be at home in as a gay Christian.  A church that is affirming of me as gay.  They are out there, just hard to find. So I still want to visit around. Which I will on a regular basis. 

Diet and Exercise My friend is inspiring me to be more regimented in my diet and exercise than I have been,  I need to pay more attention to amounts and what I eat.  Now that I am only on call 2 nights a week and not running back and forth like I was, perhaps I can do better. I hope to be in a better sleep pattern, that is a key to healthy metabolism. My friend Branden is making progress and living healthier and exercising.  He is blogging about it as well, check his blog out and encourage him and perhaps be inspired yourself!  See the link to his blog below, or click the link on the sidebar of this blog.

 http://www.madfatmandiary.blogspot.com/

Happy September to you all!




 

Saturday Thoughts

On call last night was uneventful, which can be good for the patients.  There are a lot of thoughts going through my mind today.  Rather eclectic. 

First, I am pleased with the Supreme Court rulings on Same Sex marriage.  That gives me some hope for the future.  Its nice to know there are some legislators who are embracing the rulings and making preparations for the future legislation in regards to this issue. Its a good thing.

On relationships, and friendships. No matter close or not, work related, or personal,  always seem to be complicated in some way. But nothing real in life worth anything is ever simple.  Especially where love is involved. And unrequited love is such a painful bitch! One of my prayers is not to experience this again in my life, but that is the risk one takes when opening up to another person.  It can be worth the risk.  I don't regret taking the risk either.   I still hope one day to find that special someone, if that person exists. If not well  I have friends in my life to whom I offer and give love no matter what. Who I could never turn my back on, who are worth the struggles of relating and  their love is returned. True friends in your life can be like family, the family you choose.

I read a quote today, "Friends can be lovers, but lovers are not always friends" there is truth in that.

Wow does that sound mushy or what?  

On a lighter note, my plans for starting classes are in motion, I have a meeting this next week with the Admissions Director to discuss the classes I plan to take this school year, and the financing, also possible aid sources.  I plan to take a class on campus the fall semester, I think that will give me a good start, the winter semester will be online.  That will save me the trouble of winter travel. 

My roommate and I will be moving to a new place in another part of town in about a month.  I hope this new place will be a better experience for us than where we are now.  Especially maintenance wise. The one thing I will miss about this complex, is the lake, trees, wildlife and peaceful setting.  But I won't miss the parking issues, water leaks, out of date appliances, and HVAC.  Unfortunately idiot neighbors are every where. 

Well I think that is enough thought letting for one post.
Happy Saturday!

 

A MILESTONE FOR THIS BLOG

I check my blogger dashboard frequently, mostly to see the blogs I follow. Its interesting to see where the readers are from, some all over the world.  As well as the posts they view, I only wish there were more comments or dialogue.  I guess there is not much to say?  I started blogging to express myself, and write about my journey out of the closet.  I also wrote about some of my experiences, and hope and dream for a relationship.  My blogging has evolved overtime to include not only my personal journey and thoughts on gay issues, also anything that comes up I want to comment on.  a regular post I started is Monday Medley, where I share songs I like. some by a theme, others are random selections I hear on the radio. 

The milestone?  This blog has had over ten thousand views!  I hope some of my blogging will give a different perspective on being gay and Christian. Sometimes I blog to express myself and invite your thoughts, experiences, to see if I am off track, on track or whatever. 

I thank you for your interest in my blog, your comments, emails, encouragement. Please keep reading! Speak once in a while!

Good News To Share

So I'm sitting at a stop light in a little place called Phoebus.  The phone rings and its a Richmond area number.  The person on the other is the Director of Admissions of the School I applied to.  After exchanging pleasantries, she congratulates me on my acceptance to the MTS program!  Needles to say I am very pleased and relieved! 

This morning I took the next step and filled in the confirmation form for my acceptance and paid the fee, (which will be applied to my tuition)  so its official!!!

Next I will make an appointment with the Admissions office to go and map out my degree plan and financing.  There will be a written plan to follow, I will be attending on a part time basis.  Since I am in ministry. From what I understand a new schedule is in the works, one that is more friendly to people in my position. They call it a hybrid schedule, which includes online and an on campus class schedule which allows the student to come to campus one day a week and take  classes they need.

The only wrinkle in my plan is they do not allow clinical classes in the program I have been accepted to..  However, I am looking at what closely related classes can be taken as electives.  My Clinical Pastoral Education Units will not transfer, which is actually better since the Association of Professional Chaplains would not count them toward certification. 

Perhaps when they retool the Master of Divinity, I may re-visit that degree program so I can add clinical courses.  For now I am happy with the direction things in my life are taking. 

Happy Easter 2013!!!

The Scripture tells us the disciples had a greeting, it went like this...

HE IS RISEN! to which the response would be...HE IS RISEN INDEED!

Today is a busy day in my life, I am working, I will be rounding at one facility and on call for another facility.  In all honesty, I am not looking forward to running back and forth all day. Then again there may not be any calls... just maybe. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Maundy Thursday 2013

Tonight is Maundy Thursday, and I was able to attend the service at my church.  It was nice we had Communion, music, and Scripture readings.  Its a particularly meaningful service. 

In honor of this day I want to share a passage of Scripture which tells the story of the Last Supper.

Luke 22:7-23 Then came the day of Unleavened Bread on which the Passover lamb had to be sacrificed. 8 Jesus sent Peter and John, saying, “Go and make preparations for us to eat the Passover.” 9 “Where do you want us to prepare for it?” they asked. 10 He replied, “As you enter the city, a man carrying a jar of water will meet you. Follow him to the house that he enters, 11 and say to the owner of the house, ‘The Teacher asks: Where is the guest room, where I may eat the Passover with my disciples?’ 12 He will show you a large upper room, all furnished. Make preparations there.” 13 They left and found things just as Jesus had told them. So they prepared the Passover.

14 When the hour came, Jesus and his apostles reclined at the table. 15 And he said to them, “I have eagerly desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer. 16 For I tell you, I will not eat it again until it finds fulfillment in the kingdom of God.” 17 After taking the cup, he gave thanks and said, “Take this and divide it among you. 18 For I tell you I will not drink again of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes.” 19 And he took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is my body given for you; do this in remembrance of me.” 20 In the same way, after the supper he took the cup, saying, “This cup is the new covenant in my blood, which is poured out for you.

21 But the hand of him who is going to betray me is with mine on the table. 22 The Son of Man will go as it has been decreed, but woe to that man who betrays him.” 23 They began to question among themselves which of them it might be who would do this  

 

The religious leaders of the day sought ways to destroy Jesus Christ, He would not to conform to their norm. He came to bring a new normal. he came to change the status quo.  Even today those who don't conform to the religious traditions are marked as outcast, and even persecuted. how this must grieve our Lord!

 

A song to share Secret Ambition by Michael W. Smith. http://youtu.be/2vHedm6ycsY  

 

Monday Medley: Holy Week Edition

It Holy Week Monday.  Today begins Passover for my Jewish friends as well.  This week in many Christian churches there will be a service on Thursday call Maundy Thursday which commemorates the Last Supper of Jesus and his arrest. On Good Friday there are vigils commemorating the Crucifixion.  All leading up to Easter Sunday!  In honor of this week I want to share several songs with you Hope you enjoy
Have a great week!


 http://youtu.be/WBaEA0H02fI   All Glory laud and Honor (organ)



http://youtu.be/_ajFnnKFivY Hosanna Hillsong United.

http://youtu.be/EqmLkLDE82U  Blessed is He Who Comes in the Name of the Lord Michael W. Smith

 http://youtu.be/FHrRJVjQCMw   Passover Seder Song

So There Is A New Pope!

Though I am not Catholic,  I watched with interest for the selection of the new Pope. So now the selection has been made, Pope Francis is set to be officially installed next week. I like the name he selected for himself, Francis, obviously a nod to St Francis of Assisi.  I wonder what kind of leader he will turn out to be? How will the trappings of his office and power impact him as time goes by?  Well only time will tell.

He is the first Pope from this hemisphere! That is a good change, from Argentina, South America, I am told this area of the world has forty percent of the Catholics in the church.  I also understand the part of the world he is from holds to a liberation theology.  I wonder if or how that will carry over to his Papacy?    Again time will tell. 

Pope Francis is conservative, traditional which does not surprise me.  This means we will not see any movement on LGBT issues, female Priests, or other social issues. In Fact I read in Jeremy's blog,  My Side of the Street, his post  title New Pope Francis believes same-sex marriage and gay adoption are the Devil’s work, where the new Pope has made anti LGBT comments in the past.  I do not expect this to change.

So no surprise it will be the status quo. yet there maybe changes in other ways on other issues. As stated before only time will tell!

A Reason To Celebrate!

Next week I begin a new position with one of the hospitals I work for.  I will have a change in my classification.  Which means guaranteed hours per pay period,  benefits. I will stay non exempt which is good since I will still have shift differential,  holiday pay when I work a holiday, and overtime.  (not that they allow overtime) Did I mention benefits?  Something I really need!

Most of my hours will be at the hub Hospital, but I will still work a shift hour at the smallest Hospital in our system.  This will give me more hours, and I will still work flex-pool for the other health system. I may need to reevaluate that but I like the idea of keeping my foot in the door there. 

This has been a long time in coming.  I am relieved, and very pleased! Next I have an interview for admission to the Master of Theology program I have applied to. I hope to start this in the summer, and that most of my credits will transfer. However, I have discovered my Clinical courses will not transfer which is a disappointment. Also I may not be able to take the pastoral counseling courses I want for my electives in this program.  Though it maybe allowed, I hope!  So if you pray please pray for that to be allowed. its part of the reason I chose this school and degree.

I want to celebrate!

Happy Valentines Day, Evening

Another Valentines Day, oh wonderful.  Today has been an uneventful day.  The Hospital where I served my overnight shift last night , decorated the cafeteria with white and red table cloths.  They served wonderful chocolate treats. 

I hope you had a great day and your Valentine did something special for you!

 

The Pope to Resign!

Yesterday's news, but I had to comment.  I am not Catholic, but as a Protestant who knows many who are Catholic, this is really big news.  The first time in 600 years a Pope who is resigning. It has taken the world by surprise!

 

 

My hope for the next Pope as a Protestant, gay man.

 

I hope the next Pope is more progressive than any there has been in decades.

I hope the next Pope is able to at least crack the door to making the Catholic church more open, accepting, and affirming of the LBGT community.

I hope the next Pope is open to discussing allowing Priests to marry.

I hope the next Pope is open to discussing Women as Priests. 

I hope the next Pope is from Canada or the U.S.A.

One can only HOPE!

 

Oh and apparently the picture above is indeed real! Ponder that one!

 

The Master of Theological Studies

Well I have spent time reading degree programs online, trying to find a degree I can do online. I found two programs that offered most of what I need and want. I decided to work on the application for a Master of Theological Studies.  The school is a two hour drive from here, but offers online options for study. This school is a Baptist School but affiliated with the Cooperative Baptist Fellowship, and Alliance of Baptists.  Both groups are more moderate and promote equality for sexual orientation. I checked the Mission Statement and Covenant, the Student Handbook and saw nothing that concerned me...at least thus far.  The application requires 2 references, I have not seen anything about church endorsement.  It also requires a 1000 word essay answering questions about what the degree will help me accomplish, and why I chose this school. An interview with faculty is also required. Something I like about this particular program is it offers 3 elective course opportunities. There is a course elective that is a Pastoral Counseling Practicum I would love to take, it offers a course in crisis intervention as well. Those would be two practical electives.  One thing I don't like is the Biblical Language requirement, at least it just requires one language in a  two course sequence. However, it will be to my advantage for any further work I might wish to do. Still I would prefer to use those hours toward pastoral counseling or theology. Unfortunately, I am told my Clinical Pastoral Education will not transfer into this program.  Below is the breakdown of courses

One of the following two course language sequence in the Biblical studies area:

MAB1121 introduction to Biblical Hebrew I

MAB1122 introduction to Biblical Hebrew Il or

MAB1521 New Testament Greek I

MAB1522 New Testament Greek ll

Required courses in the Biblical Studies area:

MAB1111 lntroduction to the Old Testament I

MAB1112 lntroduction to the Old Testament ll

MAB1511 lntroduction to the New Testament I

MAB1512 lntroduction to the New Testament ll

Required courses in the Historical/Theological Studies area:

MAHT2111 lntroduction to the Christian Tradition I

MAHT2112 lntroduction to the Christian Tradition ll

MAHT2311 Christian Theology I

MAHT2312 Chriistian Theology ll

MAHT2410 lntroduction to Christian Ethics

MAHT2650 World Religions 

One the following courses in the Biblical studies or Historical/Theological area:

MAB1070 Models of Biblical lnterpretation

MAB1OSO Topics of Biblical interpretation

MAB1091 Biblical lnterpretation in the Church

MAHT2312 Theology of the Church

MAHT2411 Christianity and Culture

MAHI2622 Perspectives on Global Christian Movements

MAHT2652 Jesus in a Pluralistic Age

Three Elective or specialization courses from the M.T,S. program options:

MAXXXX Electives

MA4090/99 Thesis or Comprehensive Exam

Total semester hours required for degree program completion: 51 semester hours. With what I have that will transfer in should bring my required courses to I hope 14.  This looks like a good program.

The Wrong Question to Ask!

Several days ago I made mentions of a problem with my planned application for graduate study.  Well here are the details...I found an online degree program that had everything I was looking for. it was affordable too. I even discovered my employer provides $2500 a year in tuition reimbursement for my job classification! So I was all set to apply, reading through the online application, I discovered a problem.  There are a series of questions, petty standard like have you been convicted of a felony, are you a citizen, then the question I just do not like or want to answer.  In fact I will not answer, and will not be applying to this school or other schools that ask this question.

The question;  Have you EVER engaged in Heterosexual misconduct or Homosexual behavior? i.e. engage in sex, going to gay clubs, gay chat rooms, talked about gay issues, basically are you a homosexual?  Say what??  Let that one sink in a minute....  and I thought don't ask don't tell was alive and well in the church.  Not the SBC.

Now it crossed my mind to answer the question with a NO.  However, that would be putting myself back in the closet, it would be a lie and counter productive.  Now I also thought about saying yes, but this also would be counter productive.  I am certain it would disqualify my admission and could get back to my home church.  I do not want to confirm any one's suspicions.  Then also I don't think its any one's business what my sexual preference is.

Not only do they basically ask about one's sexuality, to out oneself, they couple it with a misconduct question!  That's the SBC for you. They firmly believe people like me are hell bound, regardless!  Not gonna move them on that one either.  I checked another SBC seminary and it had the same series of questions.  I am disappointed at this, but not going to let it stop me.  I will find a school where its not important. 

A friend sent me a link to United Church of Christ seminaries, since they are open and affirming. I'm looking at them, along with a couple of more liberal seminaries here in my state. Two offer a combination of online and on campus options. The Online option is important to me.

Anyone have any suggestions?  I will continue this discussion in future posts. 

 

Transgender Rembrance Day 2012

In honor of Transgender Remembrance Day.  Let us all think of those who have been killed or injured  simply for being Transgender.  For daring to be in public as they view themselves.   For seeking recognition and love as they are for who they are.
Let our community continue to stand against this kind of  discrimination, and hate.  Please take a moment and pray for those who seek to be true to who they are.
Anti gay hate crimes and discrimination need to be included in all non discriminatory laws.

Lets stop the hate!

A Victory For Same Sex Marriage

When victories occur for the gay community its nice to pause and consider the implications.  I am referring to the NY Court decision declaring DOMA unconstitutional.  The difference with this decision is the fact that a federal judge appointed years ago by a conservative President, wrote basically the gay community has been and is being discriminated against.  That this law discriminates against a segment of american society which has rights under the constitution.  This is significant to for those of us who have the hope of one day being able to legally marry in this nation.
 
Will I see the day when same sex marriage is not rejected?  I don't know, but I have a glimmer of hope. Of course if I ever find one I want to marry, we could go to a state, or nation where our marriage is accepted. 
Sign me hopeful but realistic.

Come out Come Out Where ever You Are!!

In honor of National Coming out Day, Won't you take the bold freeing step out and be yourself?  Know YOUR truth...Claim your Voice!

At least acknowledge it to yourself for yourself that is a first step.  John 8:32 "You shall know the TRUTH and the truth shall set you FREE" 

Choose wisely who you acknowledge this too. Not everyone will be accepting. Those who truly love you will accept you.

The most important thing is to be YOU. be comfortable in your own skin, find peace. 

I found peace when I accepted me the way God made me!

Open that door let the light shine in.

A link to It Gets better . org

http://www.itgetsbetter.org/video/

Hate Mail...Really?

From the beginning of my very first blog post I knew I might draw negative comments from time to time.  Which I have, and I do not post those unless it adds something to think about. Its one thing to disagree, express your opinion, but totally another to be disagreeable and express hatred.  Those kinds of comments are always deleted, never posted. Especially when its from an anonymous source!  If your going to leave a hateful comment at least have the guts (I really wanna say balls) to own your words.   Sometimes its an email, I do not respond to these as there is no room for dialogue. It would accomplish nothing. 

The series of posts on relationships I just completed, has elicited a few responses mostly positive emails, but a couple of negative and down right hateful comments. Now I welcome all comments, I enjoy the dialogue with people.  Sometimes I hear a viewpoint that helps me greatly or at least gives me something to think about.   I draw the line at hate mail, I will not listen to or dignify with a response someone calling me or people who might read this blog names, and telling me I am cursed. Or that I need to repent, and receive healing, seek "re-parative therapy".    One asked how someone like me can do the work I do without bringing condemnation to everyone I meet. There is no room in my life for hate. These from folk who call themselves christian. I won't judge you as you have judged me. God is our judge, and I resist the urge to preach at you through this blog, but I ask you how is that bearing fruit for the Lord and making a difference in a life? How is that edifying? The Scripture says "you shall know them by their LOVE"

My relationship posts talk about love, its often a thread of commonality that runs through the kinds of relationships I spoke about.  Love is created by God, God is love, not hate.

Well enough said about this, I could write more but I will save that for my journal.  I like my posts to be about positive things or at least how I'm dealing with negative aspects of this life.

Again I welcome your comments and emails, I enjoy the dialogue.  If you have some positive insight or a question please submit a comment or email.