Monday, July 21, 2014

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

For The Children

Is it me or does there seem to be a rash of parents neglecting and or "giving" up their young defenseless  children?  Allowing a child to suffer and die in a hot car is cruel.  Riding a metro train and just pushing your helpless child out the door in a stroller is senseless. If you don't want or can't handle the responsibility of raising a child then don't have children or give them up for adoption.  many states and localities now have a safe haven law, which allows parents to safely give up an infant or toddler by taking them to and turning them over to staff in an emergency room.

Our children are a precious gift from God, and need to be loved, nurtured, and protected. I agree with a friend who always says people should be required to take parenting classes and be certified before they have children. Extreme but could make a big difference in a lot of lives.

Sunday, July 13, 2014

Ministry with a Twist

Recently I was at work going over the list of patient's in the facility.  I saw a familiar name and wondered. so I went to the room to visit and it was who I thought it was.  We had a good conversation, this patient is someone who has known me since I was a teenager in the church I was part of from the time my family moved to Hampton Roads. He got better and went home, this week he was back in the Hospital at the end stage of a cancer diagnosis.  He chose to go home with hospice.

Part of the purpose of this blog is for me to reflect on things that impact me.  Mostly about being gay and such.  However, today my thoughts are with this gentleman and his family.  Now there is a twist, often times events at work effect me in different ways, but usually there is a certain distance. This time there is no distance, this is someone with whom I have Worshipped, had many a church dinner with, I have been in his home, his children and I are the same age group, and went to school, youth group and Sunday school together.  This is different.  Yet it is also not different in the way I respond but I gives me sadness on a different level.  He told his children he worked to teach them how to live and have faith.  Now he said he wants to teach them how to die with faith.  They are in my prayers.

Saturday, July 12, 2014


Back in the early 1970's I was a preteen, we lived in Northern Virginia.  At that time, I started attending a local Southern Baptist Church.   I was Baptized in that church, and stayed there until my family moved to Hampton Roads.  Looking back, I guess that church was always on the moderate to liberal side, thinking back to the worship style and traditions we had.  For instance exchanging Pulpits with an Episcopal, a Presbyterian, and a Methodist Church.

Flash forward to 2014,  I was on a site  I go to sometimes called, Looking down the list of affirming churches in Virginia, I noticed northern Virginia has the most affirming churches in the state, followed by Richmond.  Second thing I noticed there was a church with the address of that church I attended on the list!  However it had a different name, so I clicked on its website, and  found it was the church I was Baptized in!  It's American Baptist and part of the Alliance of Baptists now.  Yes it is open and affirming!  Wonders will never cease, will they?  In fact, as I scoured the site, I found that Music Director is openly gay, the Church Administrator description says she lives with her partner, (Female).  I noticed a link to the DC Pride site, and the Co Pastor saying they would have a table again this year at DC Pride.  WOW! to think I was a member of that church. 

I am going to try and plan a long weekend soon and go to church there.  If I there was ever a position that would pay me enough to live there again, I might try it.   

Monday, June 16, 2014

Monday Medley: Classical Monday, a Modern Composer Music for 18 Musicians by Steve Reich - Beginning

Welcome to another Monday.  Today something a bit different... a classical song by a modern composer Music for 18 Musicians by Steve Reich. 

I know I have not posted much here lately, too much going on and it seems not enough time to put into words here to express it all.  I shall as I can.
Hope you enjoy the music.

Monday, June 9, 2014

Monday Medley: Calvin Harris - Summer (Audio)

Hope you had a good weekend, here its Monday again!  So time for another Monday medley, I heard this song on the radio and liked it so I thought I would share it here.  Hope you enjoy!

Friday, June 6, 2014


Back in the early days of Chaplaincy work, when I had a hard day or night in the Hospital, I often would put this song on in the car on the way home and I would crank it up.  Some how it got out of me what I was feeling or thinking.  I can't explain it, it just helps me. (I have written about this before)  Especially when a family member says "I wish I could tell him/her I love him/her.

A week ago today, there was a multiple shooting in the area.  Two of the victims were police officers responding to help.  One of them died as a result of his wounds. One victim killed, was a 17 year old just driving down the street.

I was at the Hospital with the family and officers there, when the news of his death was reported to them. All I can say here is the entire experience from the Trauma bay to the OR area was intense.  Perhaps the most intense I have experienced in this ministry, at least in a while.

It has impacted me all week, one problem was the fact I had very little down time afterwards.  I was on call with other calls afterward, and worked straight through to Tuesday.   I would make visits and answer calls, but afterward, be exhausted.

Crisis and situations though not mine, still has effects, physical, spiritual, and emotional.  Its been tough, but its better now and will be better even tomorrow.  Good self care is key to good health for a helping professional.

Monday, June 2, 2014

Monday Medley: A Song of Faith: Stellar Kart - Me and Jesus

Through the good times and  through the tough times, the lonely times,  the quiet times...  Bidden or not God is there and loves you. 

"Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the LORD your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you." 
Deuteronomy 31:6


Wednesday, May 28, 2014


When I walk into a patient's room and the patient tells me he or she is  "just fine"  I have to smile, because we have an acronym for the word fine.  Often when someone says they are just fine, they really aren't.  Especially if that person has just received devastating news.  In the early stages of grief, or dealing with a reality, it can be part of a defense mechanism.  It can also be used to deflect and keep from discussing something the person needs help in dealing with.

The acronym:

Fouled up
Emotionally Unstable

So now the next time someone tells you they are "fine" you can think of the acronym.