October 29

Today is October 29, a day just like any other except today would have been my father's birthday. Oct 29, 1897 he would have been 113. He died suddenly April 9th 1976. A lot of thoughts going through my mind today, about life, goals, family, hopes, and some fear as well. Fear of what might happen, or what might not happen that I hope will happen. I know I'm vague but don't want to be specific, I can't really put it into words.

Faith is what is important to me on days like today. I don't know what the future holds for me, but I know the one who holds my future. Jer 29:11 "I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, Plans not for calamity but for your welfare to give you a future and a hope"

A Great Project

The It Gets Better video project is a great and amazing project. I listened to a number of the videos I noticed the number and range of people participating is of a wide variety. The President, Secretary of State, religious leaders from differing backgrounds, including Gene Robinson. Then there are the regular folks who are willing to share their stories of how it gets better. All in an effort to give hope and encouragement to anyone struggling with their sexuality, and thinking of harming themselves.

you can view them at http://www.youtube.com/user/itgetsbetterproject#p/f/571/zpOq1HMDQKw or Google "it gets better if that does not work"

I struggled for years, but thankfully never got to the place where I considered harming myself. When I finally did get to the place where I accepted myself, the peace I experienced is indescribable. It truly does get better.

There will always be tyrants, and bullies, but we can change how we allow them to impact us. Perhaps one day gay bashing in any form will become a hate crime in every state and locality.

Crazy Politics

In yesterday's newspaper there was a small article about the republican congressional candidate in Dallas Texas. Stephen Broden, a local Pastor running for the seat, made the statement on T.V. that if the election did not produce a change in leadership he would not rule out the violent overthrow of the government as an option. WHAT??? This is the United States, we don't do that here. We have a system of elections, all people have to do to change the government is get out and vote for their candidate. That has to be the most anti-democracy statement I have heard from a candidate running for congress. That is the same kind of extremism as the Taliban. So if you don't like the leadership, the election does not go your way, you can violently overthrow them? What about the majority who voted? There is a very vocal minority who is trying to push its will on people based on religious or political beliefs. We ALL don't believe the same way. Its our right.

I certainly hope this person does not get elected. Just what our country does not need in my opinion.

What about Tolerance?

What about tolerance? I used to think that in order to be tolerant I had to compromise my belief. How wrong I was! Tolerance is about accepting, working with, and assisting a person as they are, where they are. It appears society is becoming more and more intolerant. Much of this intolerance exists along the lines of religion, and sexual orientation. Consider a small church pastor being thrust on the world stage for his threat to burn the sacred book of another faith group. Consider the volatile minority of a faith group in its persecution of women, and people who do not belong or fit their mold. Recently there was the brutal attack on a homosexual person, at the same time a political candidate articulating what I consider to be hate toward the homosexual community. We have a political group vocalizing fear, anger, and again I think hate. This list could go on and on.

Where is tolerance? This is the 21st century after all. My growth both spiritual and personal occurred when I learned to accept myself the way God made me. Then I became open and accepting of people whoever they are. Additionally my work in the Hospital greatly helped me grow. Now I am a reformed Christian, or in the words of a Biblical scholar reformed and being reformed. I suggest that if folk would look beyond themselves and their group and think through what they believe and why. Perhaps find a way to accept something about them-selves. They might be more open, and perhaps find more peace and satisfaction in life.

A Code and a Crisis

Recently, I responded to a code blue in the ER. I never know what I'm walking into when the pager goes off. I walked into the room where the patient was, everything seemed "normal" for a code. The staff was busy caring for the patient, doing the work they do. Suddenly outside the room a colleague was frantically wanting to enter. I had to restrain this person. That is when I heard who the patient was.

One look confirmed the patient was one of our own...I knew the patient. This is not the first time this has happened over the years, and it wont be the last. The patient was young, vibrant, with young children. I spent hours with family, several coworkers, and doctors came by. This community pulls together and supports one another in the moment of need yet,we must put off dealing with our own issues. After all its the ER, there is always the next patient who needs us. The hardest was helping family try to explain to the children why "mommy wont wake up"

The Hospital had a memorial service in the chapel, and did a Critical Incidence debriefing as well. Its seems like everything should stop, at least pause for a moment to reflect. The reality is life keeps moving and we keep moving with it. Yet circumstance and our body and spirit demands we pay attention to our emotions, our health, our spirit. If not how can we be there for others?

In memoriam.

My Theology: A Word about Confession and Sanctification

Confession is good for the soul is a popular saying. However, it is also very true. there are three types of confession in my life. Confessing my faith, as found in the Book of Confessions, that is confessing what I believe about God, Jesus Christ. Who God is, Father, Creator. It is also confessing my needs, my dependence on God. Then there is confession of sin. Its not confessing in order to be forgiven; rather its confession agreeing with God what he already knows about me. forgiveness of God for my sin has already been given by the grace of God. Confession is only agreeing with God and receiving forgiveness already given. No part of anything I do earns God's favor. God is sovereign and he gives forgiveness to on the basis of his grace. Not on the basis of anything I do or confess. A good example is Isiah 6. The prophet, experiences God, his response is to bow down and confess his sin, his need. God gives forgiveness. The fact that the prophet was in the presence of God is by God's sovereign plan. The prophet's response is to surrender to God's call and plan. Sanctification is our response to god's grace, a process of living a life forgiven and fulfilling God's purpose and will for each of us. Soli Deo Gloria!

My Theology: Grace

Next I need to tackle the issue of forgiveness, grace and salvation. In some Christian circles it is taught that the homosexual has no place in God's kingdom. either by being or living. The teaches there must be complete repentance and abandonment of anything to do with one's "forbidden" sexuality. Often therapy to change a person from gay to straight if offered or in some cases demanded. I do not want this writing to become a commentary on those beliefs and practices. Rather I am setting forth what I believe, what I have learned through the leading of the Holy Spirit.

Therefore, I have to state, the only thing that separates us from God is sin. The only thing that separates one eternally from God; is rejecting God's offer of salvation by grace through Jesus Christ. Romans 8:1, tells us once one is in Christ, “there is now no condemnation”. Further, Ephesians 2: 8-9 teaches that “For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; and that not as a result of works that no one should boast.”

To say otherwise means that God's grace, the work of Christ on the cross is not sufficient. To say that would mean our God is not as sovereign as we say he is. This is not the truth or the power of God I have experienced in my life. Jesus spoke as recorded in John 14:6a, and said "He is the way the truth and life. The Bible also states in John 8:32 "you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free". The there is Romans 10:9-10, which very clearly state that if one hears, believes and responds he or she is redeemed. So this speaks to me that God's grace covers each person according to their need of grace. The who so ever will receive will be received. When we are received we are sealed with the Holy Spirit according to Eph 1:13. What Jehovah Tsidkenu does is for eternity.