Thursday, July 31, 2008

The Art of the Online Hook-up

The online hook up, it seems simple. Go online, find a gay dating site, or any kind of dating site depending on your life. Post a profile , contact members be contacted and hook up. Simple right? easy right? So it would seem; But the reality is quite different! Some are just looking around, being curious and using the anominity the internet can provide to do so. I know I did. There are some who are looking but when it comes to committing to a meeting they don't, some even agree to meet but then don't show up. I have been stood up countless times. There are some who make a game out of not showing up.

Then there are the safety concerns. What might happen if they do indeed show up. some are hustlers who ask for money, others want to do things your not into or someway they are a turn off. Of course there is the risk of robbery, gay bashing, SDT's all the risks of hooking up. So why do it? Good question! The reason is not complex, its for the sex, or the possibility of sex, for the thrill of meeting a potential relationship partner. Who knows he just might be THE ONE. Plus to have a profile and be contacted and told your "hot" or whatever can be a thrill as well.

I have been "cruising" online for a number of years now. I don't hook-up much at all, it happens now and then. My last boyfriend was an online meeting, we were together for almost a year. My best-friend has taught me alot about online stuff. In fact we are on some of the same sites, a funny thing one time I saw his profile and did not realize it was him. I contacted him to let him know I was interested. He was too! We got into an online conversation before realizing there was something very familiar about this guy. I asked his name and bam. It was a real hoot. He has taught me about being safe, key things to look for. Now some of it you just know, its common sense. One thing I use as a rule of thumb. If the conversation is serious, and the other person wants to see a picture (face pic) before I send it I ask if I can call him. I want to hear his voice, and talk with him. this usually tells me if the person is serious. if not then I say no thanks and move on.

My latest "hook up" worked that way. This guy was real nervous, but he gave me his phone # I called, a sexy voice on the other end. We talked, agreed to a time and place to meet up. Guess what? He showed up! It turned out he is partnered, but things are not well in the relationship. In fact the relationship is pratically non existent anymore. We talked at length about it in fact he cried, I tried to give him some comfort. When he started crying I found myself saying the words I have heard from my CPE supervisor so often "Whats THAT all about?" This guy is sweet and sensitive. I'm a sucker for sweet and sensitive. We enjoyed each other, he said he would want to talk with me again. We will see. I will say yes to him again. Who knows HE might be the ONE.

Please note online hook ups should be taken seriously, you never really know who is on the other end till they show up. caution should always be used as with any blind date meet in a public place.

1 comment:

manxxman said...

I can second that.....I had one horrible experience from it, I was blackmailed and the FBI had to be called in. They went as far as to perform a "sting" operation which was successful and the three went to prison for 3 years (as it was considered a Federal crime they had to serve at least 80% of their time and one was a foreign national and was deported at the end of his term). I didn't exactly get away scot free as it made the local TV and newpapers.